By: Olivia Knott
Matthew McConaughey is looking longingly at Kate Hudson as she sits on the toilet. He kneels before her and gazes into her eyes with his dreamy blues, and he makes her laugh. Then, after he makes her laugh (and makes me cry) he kisses her and I swoon.
If any of you recognized that scene, it’s from the rom-com classic How to Lose a Guy In 10 Days and yes, I am still suffering over Matthew McConaughey. Anyway, this is all to say that romance movies just aren’t what they used to be. Have you guys ever watched that one dumb movie where this one guy throws a football at a cheerleader and she catches it with impressive agility, and the oof says “Nice catch, cheer” and the cornball says “Not my name, quarterback?” WORST MOVIE EVER (second to Twilight but at least that was a funny comedy).
Romance of the olden days used to be remarkable because of their simplicity and jocularity. Romances were able to make fun of themselves, they didn’t take themselves too seriously like Anne Hathaway and that one guy whose name I forgot did in that atrocious film The Idea of You. Nor did romance try so hard to be unnecessarily inclusive-by that I mean they didn’t just add characters just to say they added them. They had barely relevant side characters that helped the main character make the choice to go after the guy, but they weren’t really involved. Granted, their presence is essential in making of the show, nevertheless they were just there. I don’t think you really need to randomly add a Black person or an Asian person or a British person just to say you did. It degrades the art more than if you just hired them because they were good, Black, Asian, British, whatever, you know?
Romance never gave you the hope that this couple was going to last for years-I mean sometimes they did but, in a way, you knew it was never gonna last and in a way it made it a little more realistic. Romances now are just too serious. Now, don’t get me wrong-I love a happy ending where they last forever and ever, but in reality, the characters in romance like each other for something typically vain or fleeting. They just have a feeling. They may be like Kat Stratford in 10 Thing I Hate About You and truly confess all the things she loves about her beau, but nevertheless you know it’s just a funny show and honestly, either way if they lasted or not, you don’t really care, you were just glad to have watched it.
Also, romances are just too smutty these days! It’s killing me. Like, can I just see a rom-com where they just kiss and confess their love in a rushed and hurried way because they are so nervous-can I see a rom-com where they don’t sleep together on the first night and do the most insane things to each other-can we witness a rom-com that does a subtle job at hinting at that without explicitly showing it?
Like, I get that there is going to be sex in real life and it would be foolish to assume that the characters in a rom-com wouldn’t do it to, but still can there be a little class to it? I know that sounds very brutish and full of judgement and I can understand how that can be interpreted, but I’m just being honest. I cannot stand watching a rom-com and they are busting it down on the first night-like oh brother! Can we get some banter? Can we get a little mirth, a little flirting, a little sense of familiarity at the very least?
I wish that romance left a little more up to the personal connection between the characters instead of the lust. I liked when romances were more focused on the nervousness that the characters share, like how Hugh Grant was so wonderfully enchanted by the mysterious actress Anna Scott, played by the even better actress Julia Roberts, in the rom-com classic Notting Hill.
I think a part of why romance now is so smutty is because people write romances for an outlet for their own unfulfilled fantasies. Some writers just write the freakiest stuff ever just because they wish they could do it but they can’t because they’re a mother of three and married to their balding husband. And there’s nothing wrong with baldie! But like, I think it’s some form of…weirdness to write about the most obscene things just because you are unfulfilled sexually.
The writing of a rom-com, or the writing of anything, should not be a fantasy for the writer. It’s hard because naturally when you write, you will include aspects of yourself whether that be your house or where you live or how you are, but it can’t be some sort of fantasy that you would love to live out. It has to be realistic, even if it’s disappointing. And if it’s not realistic, but rather quixotic and ditzy in nature, then you have the makings of a classic rom-com.
What makes a good romance movie is a sense of unseriousness and improbability. Writing should be for fun, for information, for lessons, for all sorts of stuff. I think romance sucks so hard right now because people have forgotten one of the most important things about life: humor. Romance movies now are way too intense: they try too hard to make a statement, they go too far to make a point, and they are just lame. The plot is boring, the thought is boring, and everything is very predictable.
Also, even aside from romances, I think that movies have started to suck more because of the absence of God/the absence of hinting at God in movies now. I feel like the best movies and the greatest classics are the ones where God is hinted at or mentioned in some sort.
I think that God makes any story better and He automatically adds more meaning to it because, at least for me anyway, it just makes the romance or movie at hand more special and meaningful. I love when writers include God in their work, and I feel like it works perfectly in a romance movie. A sign from God, an angel from Heaven, those things that make the main character run through the bustling streets of New York just to find her man.
All in all, what I’m saying is that romance movies have lost their charm. They have lost their charisma and-most importantly-they have lost their fun. They have lost their whimsy, their jocularity, their lightheartedness, their faith, and essentially everything good. I feel like there are still some good romances that exist (certainly not that horrendous comedy the QB and Me though). But, I must say, I think that the best romance movies had their flair in the ‘90s and 2000s, especially with Matthew McConaughey and all 🙂